My overly paranoid mom…

I need some advice – About three months ago, when I was at my friends house my sister went through my ipod and found out from a conversation I was having w. my friend that my boyfriend of 9 months and I were having sex. That night… my two sisters, & my mom sat me down and confronted me about the situation. They didn’t yell at me or anything but they told me how the truly felt about my boyfriend. They also banned me from going to his house…

My mom being the paranoid person that she is set up a doctor’s appointment to have blood-work done because she was convinced I had a STD. I am fine, and the blood-work came out good. Although everything is ok she is STILL not letting me over my boyfriends house.

I tried everything even using the excuse that he was going to tutor me. I don’t want to sneak because I don’t want to make the situation worse if she finds out I went behind her back and went there. Where I live there is nothing really to do… Just the mall and movies and my boyfriend and I are in the process of looking for jobs, so this all makes me upset because I want to see my boyfriend more.

I miss him. I talked to my mom about it, but every-time I bring it up she avoids the subject and I don’t know what to do anymore. I feel like she doesn’t trust me, but what does she expect me to be a virgin forever? She needs to let me grow up. I feel like I ran out of options… I want to be able to go to my boyfriends house again… what can I do to convince her to let me go there?

Well first and foremost I would like to use this opportunity to remind the readers of our website if your scared of something getting out make sure you don’t message it, and if you do make sure you clear your history and empty the trash can! If you don’t your just asking for problems to arise, people have a nasty habit of searching through people’s files.

It sounds like you’re in a tough position, your mom and family obviously don’t approve of your choice of a boyfriend. It sounds like it’s something larger then just not liking the way he dresses, to me from past history of friends your mom has a valid reason for wanting to keep you away from him… and maybe you should consider sitting down with her and having a heart to heart. Find out what she doesn’t like about your boyfriend and what her concerns are about you two dating.

I do know your 18 so you’re a legal adult in most countries in the world, that being said if you live with your mom your likely living under her rules. If you go behind her back your going to look like a disobedient teenager who is rebelling and let me tell you, you will be caught and the punishment will be far worst then it is now. You’re not going to be able to create an excuse to visit his house, because yes parents were teenagers and yes they messed around in the past so they have first hand experience.
Like I said before your pretty much stuck, but you may be able to sit down with your mom and talk to her and explain that your growing up and you know that she’s worried and you want to do what you can to remove that fear so she can begin to trust you to handle your life. I think you’ll get pretty far with that, considering how she handled the news of you’re past “adventures”. I know communicating isn’t the solution you were looking for but talking things out is your best chance at not having to go against your mother’s wishes. As always please feel free to keep me up to date and let me know if you have any questions.